A Sausage Dilemma

Since losing Mamoru as he heads back to his homeland, I have reflected on meeting this individual and all the things I remember about him. His strange moustache; the gauze hunting vest he would wear every day over the top of a range of ripped off football shirts; his ever-present penchant for beef.

What goes on in that man’s mind is a mystery, probably even to him. One day I decided to give the class a load of pictures that have different names in British English vs Australian English (e.g. plug socket vs power point, plaster vs Band Aid, and most famously flip flop vs thong). Everyone was struggling with this a bit. However, it wasn’t until I looked at Mamoru’s page that I realised how far off people were.

Next to a picture of some sausages (a.k.a ‘snags’), he’d written ‘Gerry’. I asked him why. He explained that that sausages were originally from Germany and ‘Gerry’ was a slang word for a German. You can’t fault the logic – apart from that it was what veterans of WWII referred to Nazis as. Thankfully there were no Germans in the class at the time… mind you, they probably wouldn't have minded.

I now refer to sausages as ‘Gerries’ and recommend it becomes part of the English vernacular.

Mamogeddon (11/2/12 - 14/2/12)

A tear is shed as we come to the final three entries of the Mamoru Diary. He has a farewell party in or near Hyde Park – I can’t really tell. He eats yet more meat and – his final goal complete – eats an entire sheep! It seems that he polished off the meal with a “small block slice of meat”. Sounds delicious.

Finally, his swan song comes. And what a belter! First, emotion catches hold and causes some very unusual trouble with spelling days of the week. He then lapses momentarily into Yoda speak – though I’ve always had suspicions that he is really a Jedi master. He ends with a romping description of Australia that outstrips ‘Where the bloody hell are ya?’ by a mile. Read on. Savour. Enjoy.

11th Feb 2012

I have to say final parting, good bye’s greetings.

I went to meet to some friends on near Hide Park. I said, good bye and thank you very much.

Everybody is good guys.

12th Feb 2012

I ate beefsteak last week.

I ate a lamb today.

I have not eaten sheep steak. We can eat sheep. Of course Japan is buying mutton lamb from Australia.

I ate small block, slice of meat.

I haven’t ever eaten sheep steak.

14 Feb 2012

Wense Wendneday Thouseday, Friday, Sutrday. Just 4 days I have.

I enjoyed enough Sydney.

It is flat town and greenful. Walthy country.

Natural resources, foods, nice view. Malti culture. Very thing wonderful.

---

Thank you, Mamoru. Your diary was very entertaining. It was very kind of you to share it. I hope you have a great life back in Japan and rock that sushi restaurant you work at.

Mamoru and his dislike of despots. (7/2/12 – 10/2/12)

Just like the North Koreans, Iran is in Mamoru’s sights and he’s not happy with what he sees. Another topic we can refer back to the annuls to is those lazy sods at Darlington Barracks. It was in December that Mamoru tried to go there and failed due to an enormous staff Christmas holiday. Personally, I wonder why Mamoru is so interested in the barracks. Could he be a spy? Hmm.

By the way, is it bad I thought it was in bad taste when the guide/veteran told Mamoru he’d been to Japan many times?

And lastly, Mamoru shows his commitment and tenacity to his studies that he was given a presentation task to do. Although he was due to leave before the assessment was given, Mamoru did do the presentation. It was on family values in each student’s country and in his typically lateral way, Mamoru based his presentation on the Japanese royal family. It was interesting and thoroughly entertaining.

7th Feb 2012

Iran is making a nuclear weapon. Western nations will stop to import of oil from Iran, also Iran starts embargo to Europe. Iran is received big damage and Iran can’t use US dollar and banks.

Perhaps it starts revolution movement in Iran.

9th Feb 2012

I did skip a school.

I went to a Victorian Barack at Darlington.

I saw the Barack’s bildings and everywhere in camp. I was lectured from a veteran.

He has visited to Japan many times. He knew Japan. He was wonderful guide.

10th Feb 2012

I have to do a task, presentation. I finish on 17th Feb.

I don’t have a due obligation. I thought, however, I have to do it.

“Next week, I will eat a lamb. Sheep meat.” (3/2/12 – 6/2/12)

On one of his meanderings, Mamoru decides to head to Hyde Park for a laugh. He seems to enjoy himself. However, he finally has something that really makes his ticker kick: Aussie beef! I’m very pleased – though the taste of meat seems to put a fire in ol’ Mamoru’s belly. His next challenge is to eat a whole lamb. Good luck with that, Mamoru.

He ends this set of three with a good news/bad news tale. Unfortunately he still can’t find a model train made in Australia, but he does discover an old model made in East Germany, before the Berlin Wall fell. Is he lukey? I think so!

3th Feb 2012

I went to Hide Park.

I was walking around the park Elizabeth Street. Any street.

I don’t have any reason.

I’m going to back Japan on 18th so I don’t have time enough.

I just walked in Park.

4th Feb 2012

I went to the pub for have lunch. I ate beef staek, Aussie beef. Cost was $15.

It was delicious, cheaper and comfortable place.

I had a great time.

Next week, I will eat a lamb. Sheep meat.

6th Feb

I have lived in Sydney for 8 months. I found any Lail model shops (Rolling stocks).

I looking for made in Australia. Australian made. I haven’t found it.

Almost all trains are made in China, but I fin found out Made in East Germany. It’s rare models. I got it.

Am I lukey?

Sangers and Screw-ups (29/1/12 – 1/2/12)

Back to his haiku best, Mamoru opens with a stunning ditty about how a Subway sandwich can instill and inspire a sudden lust for Australian beef and a quick peek at the South Pacific. I wonder if anyone told him Sydney’s coast is in fact the Tasman Sea?

Anyway, we also hear of a very expensive project of sending a painting he’d bought back home to Japan. The postage itself cost $20 more than he paid for the picture. Blasted Australia Post.

Finally, a rather curt entry of Mamoru lamenting his errors with ‘iar’ spelling and an object he clearly mistook for a toolbox. Not sure what that was… though if I remember correctly, it was the word ‘screwdriver’, which does go in a toolbox.

29th January

I ate Subway Sundwich.

A rest of days is around 20 days.

I want to eat Aussie beef again.

I want to go to Manly Beach again.

I want to see South Pacific Ocean in the clear sky.

30th January

I sent to Japan to bought a picture. It costed $60 paied to post office. The picture was $40. Totally $100.

Memory was too expensive. I hope it reaches to Japan exactly and parfect.

1th Feb 2012

Today’s course is too difficult.

I took a mistake ‘–iar–‘

I thought it was ‘toolbox’.

Mamo-loony (26/1/12 – 28/1/12)

Australia Day! Mamoru clearly sinks far too many Carlton Blacks whilst at a vintage car festival in the City on our national day. He doesn’t say so, but the following day’s entry is such complete bonkers, he must have still been really quite drunk. In detail, he forgets the month on his diary, he’s under the impression Australia doesn’t have any industry and he thinks we ‘bread castles’ whatever that means.

Finally, a return to normal when he finds an excellent model train to add to his collection back home in Japan. Strangely, however, he seems afraid of it.

26th January

Australian’s national day.

I saw many bintage car, classical car on the Macquarie street.

Morris. Humber. There is nothing. Triumph don’t make a cars now. Just motor sycle.

I could see Japanese cars. ISUZU. DATSUN. ISUZU is specially of trucks, doesn’t make sedans, cupe in now. When was start of motorization in Australia?

27

Rest of stay is less.

Australia is not richer country but walthly.

Australia is self-supporting. It is different from Japan, here is many parks in every twon. It’s beautiful and widder. Bigger.

And castle breading* is too strong. Japan can’t win to Australia, NZ.

Not industrial country.

But walthly.

28th January

I bought Rail model made by Lilipup. Maybe it was made in England.

English model company.

It cost is $45

I think this model isn’t made. Went out of print (make)

It but my bought thing is second hand. Used train model. I afraid it.

* To be fair, I think Mamoru is trying to explain Australia’s ‘cattle breeding’ industry here.

The emotional rollercoaster of Mamoru (22/1/12 – 25/1/12)

The good news: Mamoru is feeling better today after a spleen-vent in his last entry. What caused this change of mood? Food of course! And what kind of food has he found? Very good question. He tells me he discovered this rare eastern delicacy in a Chinese food court in Strathfield. Don’t ask me what he was doing there. He doesn’t live even close!

The bad news: the weather, and boy is it cheesing him off. All Mamoru wants is a bit of nice clear sky to look at the sea. This sends him into paroxysms of unintelligible gibberings that belie his true penmanship.

22th Jan 2012

I ate a ‘Chairman Mao grilled pork and rice’ for lunch.

Why did I eat? Because name was a little bit strange. I like the naming. It’s very good, but I don’t assist Mao and his politics, because

Many people were died by Mao.

23th January 2012

I thought I went to Manly beach after school.

I wanted to see South Pacific Ocean but today’s weather is crowedy and little windy. Sunny and sea are making a beautiful colers. It’s Blue. We say the ‘tropical blue.’ In Japan. I will see the tropical blue.

25th Jan 2012

When I’m finished course, so it was rainy.

This summer is rain more than usual summer.

Somebody says it.

It will be rain tomorrow.

I hope no rain.

Mamoru is worried (7/1/12 – 9/1/12)

Poor old Mamoru. He’s all stressed out. First, he’s got all kinds of issues going on with his English study and he’s concerned he won’t last long on the outside, having studied in the same school here in Sydney for so long – the image of that poor old bloke from Shawshank Redemption working in a supermarket comes to mind. Then he’s got a test to work towards, and then, to make matters worse, he spots an article in a newspaper talking about how the Japanese economy is going down the pan.

A Japanese Atlas with the weight of the world on his shoulders.

7th Jan 2012

My study is the rest of one month in Sydney. I have to get a withdrawal.

English study was difficult and too long. What’s more, especially pronunciation is not good about me.

I got to study.

8th Jan

I did a task.

I wrote to typing.

I have to try exam next week. I finished one of them. I have to get ready for exam.

9th January

I read newspaper at ribrary. It was writing about tax increase.

Tax rate raise up from 5% to 10% still 2015 (consumption tax).

Japanese economic is defrateing in now. Since 2010, Japan’s GDP didn’t grow up, not gain. So many people will be proletaran.

Income is not change but bill will gain.

Mamoru the Commando (14/1/12 – 16/1/12)

Another tour de force from Mamorascal. He decides he needs a bit of culture and has a look at the Picasso exhibit, but can’t understand what the fuss is all about. Then he has a bit of a quiet one and plans ahead for a day of fasting.

Leaving the best till last, Mamoru contemplates the weather and its dampening effects on his person. He finally discloses a potential for going commando. Intriguing stuff.

14th Jan

I went to Picaso exibiti0n to Gallry NSW.

I stayed for a long time. Maybe 15 – 20 years ago I watched Picaso at UEN museum in Tokyo in Japan. I couldn’t understand any pictures and I can’t see (understand) what he did wrote and painted.

His pictures is wonderful but I can’t see pictures is I can’t I understand.

15th Jan 2012

I didn’t went out anywhere.

I didn’t buy a hum, so I won’t make sandwictche tomorrow. I don’t have lunch tomorrow.

16th Jan 2012

Morning weather is not good. Around noon, it gets went and hot.

Today was hot and wet, not dry, I felt little bit wet.

I hope sunny weather because I washed clothes yesterday. I don’t have underwear.

Mamoru: not an obscure marsupial (10/1//12 - 13/1/12)

I love the way Mamoru can always find something to talk about. Ironically he was probably the quietest student in the class. Here he talks about Japanese whaling and some Australians arrested from the Sea Shepherd. Mamoru wonders about Australians’ perspective but interestingly doesn’t give his own.

Next, his interest piqued by an earlier SBS1 show about Australian history, Mamoru heads to a couple of exhibitions about early Chinese settlers.

Finally he writes about a Zumba class he went to. Poor old fellow. He’s no Justin Timberlake, that’s for sure! The last two lines will puzzle mankind for eternity.

10th January 2012

How does Australian people think about Whale catching in Japan?

Three Australian protester were arrested in Japanese coast gard ship.

They break into the ship. I think many Australian people against a whale catching but don’t assist illegle acts on a Sea Shepherd.

11^th

I watched Chinese pohoy exhibition at Surry Hill library and 749 George Street library.

It was not very bigger but we can see Sydney’s early history.

Early Chinese came in Australia. It was in 1850s. Japan was not open country.

1868, Japan opened country and began the westerniszation.

13th Jan 2012

I got take a Zumba class and I danced rumba, salsa, Latin music around 45 minutes.

I was tired. Too much tired.

When I danced with music I couldn’t fit (match) with instructor’s actions.

I couldn’t move my body.

It was trouble.

Is your hart beaten?

Any 4 people for the Beatles.

Monkey News

I would just like to take this post over for a day to say I have gone for an entire month without any alcohol. It's been a struggle, especially with memories of Mamoru supping away on a Carlton Black every night after school and all my other students coming in still wasted from the night before, but that's it. February is over, and so is my dry spell.

Let the good times roll!

Of Festivals, History and Black Beer (7/2/12 - 8/1/12)

This time, Mamoru has a touch of agoraphobia. We all hate crowds, but at a festival, you kind of expect it a bit. He also learns about some Aussie history and seems to relish the death of white Australia. Fair enough.

Finally, and to my relief, he has another black beer. Looks like the new budget can stretch to the odd schooner and perhaps beyond as he tries to reckon on his beer-swilling capacity. He ends on a wistful note of nostalgic contemplation. Lovely.

7th January 2012

I went to Sydney Festival at hide park. Are too much people.

I couldn’t counting the number of people also Fire works was so many people too.

8 January [Mamoru: he changes his date formatting on the winds of fancy.]

“Ones up-on a time in Cabramatta” by SBS1. It is immigration of Australia’s history. It had changed White Australia. White Australian policy.

Fistly Vietnam people. Next Korean. Then other people came in Australia.

It beginning an end of White Australia and beginning malti culturimsm.

9th January 2012

I drank Carlton Black Beer at Central Station.

Sometimes I has a beer after school. It was good taste beer.

How many can I drink in Sydney?

I will return to Japan, my father land.

Mamomorphosis (4/1/12 - 6/1/12)

A change has come over our hero. Perhaps it’s the turning of another year. Perhaps – as we all do – Mamoru is changing. Developing. Becoming. First up, he changes his mind about owning a Poland cap. He’s moved on to bigger, better and more ‘gallant’ things. Next, Mamoru’s meanderings take him to the Governor of New South Wales’ pad, where Mamoru finds peace.

Finally, Mamoru has a fiscal epiphany and realizes it’s time to save some cash. Does this mean an end to his black beer and beef liver steak obsession? We will see.

4th Jan 2012

I bought two caps at Woolworths. It was official cap of Rugby Warld Cup 2011.

I’ve had got the cap and is not nessarry a Polish Cap. But it was a cool design.

It looks brave, gallant.

5th January 2012 [what’s this? January written out in full? Yet another change to date formatting? What ever next?]

There was great and quiet bilding. It was the Governer House in NSW. So I went to the Governor House. I’ve visited it just one before, but I couldn’t enter to inside.

I entered at the Governor House today. It has dignified bilding.

6th January 2012

It’s weekend. I don’t have any plans. I spent much money New Year’s Eve and New Year day. I’m going to try save money.

Keep money!

I spent wasted money so I don’t have money.

Now.

MamoRULES! Back on that horse, big fella! (1/1/12 - 3/1/12)

Back on track with his dairy and forging ahead, Mamoru hits the first three days of 2012 harder than a sumo heavyweight hitting the pie shops. He shows his excitement at getting his customary NYD classical music fix, he tells of his chilly trip to Rhodes and finally there’s some excellent buck-passing after a fruitless conversation with an elderly Vietnamese man in Cabramatta who doesn’t understand what Mamoru wants.

Also notice yet another change in Mam's date format. He's gone back to the 'th' suffix on the date, but he's started putting the month - in full - AT THE START! Dramatic stuff. Do I smell the heady whiff of a New Year's Resolution??

January 1th 2012

New Year’s Day.

I am watching new year’s concert by Wein philharmonic every year.

I watch it at Sydney this year.

I’m looking aford to see the concert.

2th January 2012

I went to Rhodes to relax at Rhodes bay. I felt cold wind when I relaxed. Sometimes, to a ferry and yogtht yacht, boat passed. I saw them and I saw any jet air planes. I will to back to Japan next mouth. I thought.

3th January 2012

I went to Parramatta Cabramatta after school.

There was Vietnam town with many Vietnam store, shop opens there. I couldn’t see Korean language and Korean shops. I told older Vietnamese person but we hadn’t conversation. It might be my English is no good or poor. Also he doesn’t understand English.

良いお年を - Yoi otoshi o, Mamoru-san! (29/12/11 - 31/12/11)

More comic genius from our masterful man from Japan. His countdown to 2012 isn’t as thrilling as I was expecting but that’s okay. The highlight? How confusing it must have been for the poor lad when the 9pm fireworks went off. Still, I think he had a good time!

By the way, that’s ‘Happy New Year’ in Japanese in the title… or at least, I think it is!

29 Dec 2011

This year has rest 3 days, including today.

It was exciting and difficulty, trouble year.

What will be next year? It will be the same year as this year.

30 Dec 2011

It begin long weekend has begun. It’s 3 days. It will start on 3th January.

It’s New Year and I will be back to Japan next month, on 19^th Feb.

I will leave at 19:00 pm. In Japan is Winter. I take care a condition oneself.

31 Dec 2011

The fainal day of this year. I was being under the Huber Brige.

Suddonry, somebody started to count down. Ten, nine, eight, seven…

It’s began just 9 ‘o clock. The frower works was very wonderful and noisy. Smokey.

Merry Christmas, Mamoru! (25/12/11 - 27/12/11)

Merry Christmas, indeed. Sadly though, our hero hits a snag when he discovers everything shuts on Christmas Day, even army barracks and their museums. Blimey, we’re a lazy lot!

Things pick up for him though, when Mamoru gets a free concert under his belt.

He is also cheered up by the fact that the long weekend is almost over and our infidel cavorting is about to cease. To celebrate, Mamoru does some laundry and has a walk around his house. What fun!

25/12/2011

I went to Victorian Barrack at Milltaly museum. But closed. It still will closed all January netx year. Reopen on 5^th February.

I visited to Victorian Barrack many times. I don’t seen yet the museum.

26 Dec 2011

Japan Australia Music Good Will Mission Concert at Sydney Opera House. I saw many pafoumuns show. It was very good especially because entry was free, 0 dollar.

Thank you very much.

27 Dec 2011

The final day of the long weekend. Today was not a hot day. I washed clothes then after I had a lunch and a beer at Homebush. What’s more, I went out around my house.

I relaxed today.

Mamoru’s Story – the missing Canterbury Tale (22/12/11 - 24/12/11)

This post hears Mamoru’s opinion on the state of this terrible summer and gives us an insight as to where he thinks Japan is. He also gives a review of a couple of Sydney’s famous beaches and finishes off with a belting appraisal of the Powerhouse Museum and its Harry Potter show.

22 Dec 2011

Today was cold. I felt cold. It’s cold summer this year in Australia. But the opposite side of Australia, is Japan. It’s very hot summer this year. Any older person was dies by warm, and last year too warm.

I hope it will be hot summer in Australia next year because cold summer gives bad effect to economics it sales down in cothes and drinks, food.

23 Dec 2011

I went to Manly beach by the felly.

Weather was in the best condition. It was a sunny and beautiful beach.

Bondai beach was beautiful and the Manly beach was beautiful too.

24 Dec 2011

I visited at the power house museum near China town. Organized a Harry Potter exibition. It enter was $20 each adult, too expensive.

I stopped to enter it.

It was not pleasure.

It was precious.

Mamo-news – no, still sounds wrong. Sorry. 18/12/11 - 21/12/11)

This time, Mamoru kicks back and has a lazy Sunday and prepares for tomorrow’s test. The test itself is, however, somewhat overshadowed by the death of Kim Jong Il. Mamo is fascinated by this and doubts it really has happened. Mamoru is suspicious of the North Koreans having nuclear material but no trigen cooling systems, which would suggest a nuclear power station. I think he might be a spy of some sort.

Things lighten up a bit in his last entry with a mosey round Enfield in an attempt to find a Poland cap. I wonder where his unusual fascination with Poland comes from? Perhaps his Polish Beef liver steak?

18 Dec 2011

Sunday, I’m being at home. I’m relaxing at room. Sometimes sleeping and study for exam, and I went to shopping.

I have to do exam tomorrow. I do my best and take easy.

19 Dec 2011

Nothe Korean dectator dead. His name is Kim, Jong Il. I don’t know why he died?

Tomorrow I’ll get a newspaper, and I think I want to buy Japanese magazine.

20 Dec 2011

Kim second of Nothe Korean’s dectator die.

It has a nuclear weapon. It most dangerous country.

I hope they won’t use the nuclear weapon. They never use. They don’t take a danger trigen policy.

21 Dec 2011

I wandered around Enfield. I couldn’t find out my target. Where is a Polish cap?

I was wanted buy the Polish cap but I couldn’t buy it. Someday I will go to Poland. I will get it.

If I could go to Poland, I get buy the Polish cap.

Mamoru – the Samuel Pepys of our time (14/12/11 - 16/12/11)

This episode leads us into Mamoru’s dark past of model train collecting and what is to become his epic crusade for an Australian made miniature train. We also discover how he feels comfortable in any surrounding – be it a Polish restaurant in Bankstown (see previous post) or, as we see below – a snazzy city bar. As long as he’s fed and watered, ‘Mamo’ is happy.

Finally he tells us about his preferred reading spot and his frustrations with government-run facilities and the gargantuan holidays they get. Enjoy.

14 Dec 2011

I’m looking for Australian locomotives and rolling stock models. I can’t find yet made in Australia.

I bought a Marklin. It is Germany.

Made in West Germany is very proud of the name.

15 Dec 2011

It was fantastic night. I had enough dinner. I had beer, 4 glasses. I didn’t want to move anywhere. I relaxed at Cargo Bar.

I had a great time.

Thank you very much.

16 Dec 2011

I read Japanese newspaper and magazine at Japan. Trade research centures riblary.

I used to read in there, but I can’t use the riblary still 7th January, because staff will get on long holiday. I won’t read the newspaper.

Ma-Ma-Ma, Ma-Mamoru… (11/12/11 - 13/12/11)

Brace yourself for more Mamorisms… hmm, that didn’t sound quite the same in my head. Anyway, this episode, Mamoru enjoys parts of cows most of us would never think eating would be an option; he then does the most English thing he’s probably ever done and resorts to the weather as a topic of conversation.

To finish up, he reveals a dirty secret – his love of the Footy Show. Matty Johns would be kicking himself if he ever found out what kind of singular audience members he’s no longer connecting with.

Dec 11 2011

I went to Banks town to a Polish restaurant. I ate a Beef liver steak.

I was first time in my life.

I used to eat BBQ Beef steak at and Bird grilled shop in Japan. But I haven’t ever eaten the Beef liver steak. It was delicious. I will go to eat there.

It cost is A$16.50.

Dec 12 2011

This summer is cold summer for 50 years since 1960s. A comementator announced it in news program.

It might a gives to effect to agriculture.

It will be poor crops any products.

13 Dec 2011 [Ahh. Mamoru has gone back to his old style of date numbering. A wise choice.]

“The Letters and Numbers.” It is the greatest TV programme in Australia. Next is “Fotty Show”.

The Letters and Numbers is nothing the type of TV programme in Japan.

If it were broadcast in Japan, people will be supplied surprised.

Mamoru’s Saga Continues (6/12/11 - 10/12/11)

I hope you’re ready for an avalanche of Mamorage as Mamoru lets rip about what a state the world is in with his review of the dailies. He talks about his trip to the travel agents and the stopover in Beijing in China – he also experiments with the spelling of that great eastern city… without much success. He finishes off with an old favourite topic: food. This time, Mamoru dreams wistfully of proper ramen in Japan.

6 Dec 2011

I read a newspaper at libraly. A article was electronic pewer in Japan. Water, nuclear, oil.

Natural Gas. Their thing’s now and fentue (demande’s forecast). Another, A scandal of the Olympas Industry.

Euro cricies. Rossian election Mr Putuim will probably win to the presedent election but He couldn’t get a votes number the last election. The newspaper wrote in yesterday

7 Dec 2011 (a.m.)

I will probably go to my travel agant, because

I have to buy an airticket for Japan.

7 Dec 2011 (p.m.)

I went to travel agant after school. I bought an airticket via Beijing to Narita Japan it cost was A$695.

Include Fee and commisiton. I haven’t been to China. I will match Paijing from airport.

I can see Paijin it little bit.

I’m looking forward to seeing it.

Dec 10 2011 [notice, Mamoru is trying a new format for dating his diary entries. Interesting!]

I ate a Ramen every weekends breakfast. It was instunt. Ramen is fitting stomach. It’s so good.

Any way, I haven’t eaten Ramen at the ramen shop in Australia.

Because It is expensive and I didn’t feel looks for good from pictur.

If I arrived to Japan next year, I would eat at the ramen shop in Narita airport.

They were the best of times and the worst of times… Mamoru’s personal saga. (3/12/11 - 5/12/11)

Here we are again and Mamoru finally gets to see the stars in the photo exhibition. He obviously likes ‘Mr’ Mick Jagger, but has some trouble with the spelling. His singular nose for adventure and more dark beer takes him to a Polish festival, but his research leaves him feeling a little deflated when he discovers the lack of Polish people in Australia and that they really haven’t been here that long.

Finally, a disaster strikes when he loses something very dear to him and has his fledgling flight of cursing in English, but without much success or aplomb.

3th Dec 2011

I went to “Star Spotting Saint – Torpez” to Sydney Westworth.

I watched around 40 photo pictures. It put on the wall hotel’s reception holl. Mr Mic Jugger Jagur Ringo Star and his wife Princess Piana. Elton Jhone anymore. The famous person in the world. If I’m going to Saint-Torpez in summer, can I meet them?

4th Dec 2011

I went to Polish festival at darling harbour.

I drank Polish black beer. It was good, but Irish’s Gunns is better than it. Polish and Polish Australian organized this festival.

Some Polish said. We are opening every year.

And Polish and Polish Australians lives in Australia it 100,000 people. Not much.

Almost Polish were lived since 1980. Not too old.

5th Dec 2011

I left at a train my cap. It bought at custam moter show in August. It was good cap and my favorat.

It has never come back.

It $25 was.

[some angry looking letters in hiragana, and then:] – Goddum am.

Goddammit.

Next post sees how far this loss has pushed poor old Mamoru over the edge. 6^th Dec is a double-pager that it looks like even his teacher gave up on correcting. The words ‘I don’t understand’ head this page. Can’t wait!

Mamoru-athon continues! (29/11/11 - 2/12/11)

After a disconsolate start to his week with a nightmare test, Mamoru picks himself up with some ramblings on unethical critics, politics and the economy and a bit of a piss-up. He also discovers the ‘th’ suffix on dates, that you will find from now on in. However, he never really gets the idea that there is also an ‘rd’ and ‘st’ at the end of some numbers, too. Comic genius… if only he’d meant to do it.

29 Nov 2011
What is one things you couldn’t live without?

Very good question in today’s lesson. Any anser is a beer. The beer is medicen in any life and for me. And the spices in my life.

Charch doesn’t appl approves for drinking. But I need it. People crowds needs alcohol. It can drink any alcohol in the communist countries.

30 Nov 2011

Some economists and critics are writting give their opinion too easily. They are not a minister, politician and governments officer. They have not to take responssivilty.

Because, they didn’t have responsivilty from front or firstly.

They are easy going.

Talking of politics and the economy, I asked him recently what part of his body he would least like to lose. He grabbed his considerable beer belly and shook it, saying “This. I don’t want to lose this. It is my GDP. Japan’s economy is going down but my GDP is going up,” he shook his belly again for emphasis, announcing “I am inflation!”

I made a joke saying if he stopped drinking and lost weight, he would be in a depression… but it just confused him.

Dec 2th 2011

We had party near Hall Town. It was early xmas party.

I drank 5 glass’s of beer, it was over drunk.

I got up Sunday morning at the momment, I had little bit headache. I slept again.

More of The Diary – sorry - Dairy! 26/11/11 - 28/11/11)

Here we are again with more of Mamoru’s classic observations. I love the way he questions everything and how beer is the centre of his strange universe. His clear distain for so-called fame in the photo exhibition culminates in a total fritz-out in his grammar, but then it’s never too far away.

His sense of value and worth also comes out very clearly in this entry, and even more excellent closing statements that he should patent.

26 Nov 2011

I found a unique photo exhibition “star” spotting in Saint Tropez. Sofitel Sydney West north. Map. Internet. I tried it but I can but I couldn’t it. I’m going to try again it school’s computer. I am find by Internet.

West north Sydney

Sofitelß what’s mean?

Daniel Engeli privat

Pictures Gallery Cyril.

27 Nov 2011

I drank a mixed a beer, it is beer and lemonade. That is not bad it’s good. It cost $4.00. it is not very hight. It’s good price. I sometime, I will drink it. I think I’ll try it again.

28 Nov 2011

Today was a exam. It too difficult. I needed a time. I was lacked enough time espacialy for grammer test. I was reduce a min. time of writting test.

I spent the time for grammer test, but I couldn’t all questions in the grammer test. What a shame!

Student’s Diary continued… continued! 22/11/11 - 25/11/11)

I am continuously surprised by how hum-drum things become so very much more interesting when this student writes about them. The way he puts things and the mistakes he makes draws me in and keeps me reading (and laughing) all the way through. It’s funny, I laugh at his writing, but it don’t ever feel like I'm taking the piss… though I suppose I am a bit. Judge me if you like. I’ll still think this stuff is funny in the morning!

For the first time, we see the emergence of one of Mamoru's true loves: black beer!

22 Nov 2011

Today is raining from hight noon. It will be rainy this week.

Rainy and Crady.

I can’t hope good weather. This week may be cold and rainy.

23 Nov 2011

I drank black beer, it is carlton black. Good taste. It has been long time. Since leave Japan.

It left from Japan.

Carlton black as good taste as as Ebisu black Japanese beer Evisu black draft beer.

25 Nov 2011

Next man day is exam. I have to try exam. Maybe I will do my best if I’m not sleepy. I don’t choose to escape from exam.

I try to work hard man day.

Gripping stuff, I know, but I didn’t have the heart to not publish the diary in its entirety – especially what you’ll find the recurrent issues he has with black beer… and perhaps the terrors of the man day test!